


You Blue Me Away (Talk About Unfortunate)

by sebasent



Series: Rayleigh Scattering [1]
Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Angst, Based on a Tumblr Post, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, M/M, One-Shot, Soulmates AU, overuse of commas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-17
Updated: 2016-01-17
Packaged: 2018-05-07 08:16:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5449694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sebasent/pseuds/sebasent
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In a world where everything is black and white until you meet your Soulmate, Barry gets lost in blue and Len can't find his way through green. They probably could have done a lot worse, in all honesty.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Blue Me Away (Talk About Unfortunate)

**Author's Note:**

> No, I do not regret that pun.  
> Hello!  
> This is based off of [this](http://aplacecalledshutupandstayhere.tumblr.com/post/135025360480/coldflash-soulmatesau-where-they-meet-and-find) and [this](http://hipster-iwaizumi.tumblr.com/post/83699126169/apharthurkirklands-au-where-everything-is-black) tumblr post (posts?)! I tweaked the first one a little, hope that's okay. Also, I think I messed up the numbers OTL.  
> Please enjoy!

 

** i. **

Rushing to work had become routine for Barry; he doesn’t even try to fight it anymore, really. He accepted his fate as _bound to be fashionably late to just about anywhere_ a while ago, anyway, and it doesn’t bother him much anymore, though he really isn’t one to talk for other people- “other people” being one Captain Singh, who always glowers at him as he enters the precinct however many minutes past the hour.

…which is what he’s supposed to be doing now, but, well, he has priorities, and coffee is sadly at the top of his list.

Coffee, which gets spilled all over a stranger and himself the minute he walks out of Jitters, and many things happen at once: he gets burnt, his eyes snap upwards, and all he can focus on is _blue_.

Blue. A colour. Which Barry isn’t supposed to see, because he’s seen in black and white all his life and the only occasion he’s supposed to see colour in is when he first meets his- Oh.

oh _shit_.

Talk about good first impressions.

“I’m Barry,” he tells this stranger, his _soulmate_ , and the coffee is forgotten, cooling on their skin and clothes and the asphalt beneath their feet but neither can find it in themselves to care.

“Len,” his Soulmate replies, a crooked smile on his face.

This is how it starts.

** ii. **

“Leonard? Seriously? It’s almost as bad as Bartholomew. Your dad’s in prison, too, so hey, maybe we should start a club!”

“Very funny. Snart ain't the prettiest either, kid.”

“Snart?”

“My last name. What about it?”

“You’re a... criminal?”

“Hm. Took you long enough. That a problem, kid?”

“I’m not a kid, I’m twenty-five!”

“Well, that’s reassuring. Is it a problem, though, _Barry_?”

“…No? It’s just surprising. And problematic. I’m a CSI at the CCPD.”

“I know.”

“Wha- how?!”

“Your ID, Barry.”

“Oh. Of course. Sorry.”

“Don’t be. We may have to work around _that_ particular problem, though.”

“Yeah…”

** iii. **

The coffee shop they frequent is on the other side of the city from where Barry usually hangs out, as to not attract much attention to them.

Barry isn’t happy about the secrecy- it pains him to be unable to tell Iris or Joe ( _especially_  Iris) about this- but it is necessary due to Len’s… _unconventional_ line of work. They’re happy to spend time together, though, whether it’s there or at one of Len’s safehouses (to which Barry is always welcome, Len says one day, and Barry isn’t very keen towards), and everything is… surprisingly normal.

 Or as normal as it can be, at least- they’re soulmates, sure, and they started off better than most do, but that doesn’t erase the fact that they stand on opposite sides of the law and the blissful ignorance they try to pass off as selective reality is going to come bite them in the ass later. For now, though, they hold on to it for dear life and pretend that their only problem is that Len likes pineapple on pizza.

They try and make everything work; Len is as honest as he has ever been, because he’s had lessons in how dishonesty can damage a relationship, and he doesn’t want to lose Barry so early (or ever, really) into what is turning out to be the best thing he’s ever been able- or even allowed himself- to call _his._ Barry seems to share this sentiment, if his bright grins and exited chatter are anything to go by; these fuzzy feelings in Len’s chest are unlike anything he’s ever experienced before, and even if it should scare him _shitless_ that this kid already has him head over heels stupid for him, Len really couldn’t care less.

For example, how Barry’s love for colours Len finds truly endearing, to say the least. Len would be lying if he said that he didn’t find them interesting and beautiful as well, but the way that Barry shares his wonder and enthusiasm makes Len feel like he’s melting, but in a good way; Barry’s scientific rambles, as little as Len may understand, are incredibly interesting and educational, and it hurts Len’s heart to hear that people normally cut Barry off because they think it’s annoying (after learning this Len makes sure that Barry knows that Len actually likes it when he rambles on about anything, even if he doesn’t wear his heart on his sleeve the way Barry does).

Barry’s little quirks and habits are rapidly growing on Len, and he doesn’t know if it’s this whole Soulmates thing or something else, but he honestly couldn’t care less.

Barry is amazing, and all Len cares about now is his happiness.

** iv. **

Barry hears about Len’s heist from the man himself a few weeks before he does from Joe. By the time Joe’s complaining about it over dinner, though, Len and his associates are already halfway to Metropolis with whatever they'd taken (Barry hadn't really wanted to ask, because it’s a reminder of what exactly Len’s line of work is) and Barry’s nodding along, feigning interest and outrage in whatever Joe’s saying.

Barry wanted to come with Len, leave for Metropolis at dawn. He wasn’t keen on the idea of letting his soulmate be apart from him for so long, but Len was the voice of reason in this and reminded Barry of exactly how suspicious it would look that they both disappeared at the same time, and how bad it would be for everyone involved.

 Neither of them was happy, but they both also know it was necessary; and so their farewell had been heartfelt and steamy, ended with sweet kisses and whispers and definitely no tears.

  They can’t afford tears, Len thinks, and it’s a ridiculous thought because it’s not like he’s never going to see Barry again. And this- whatever it is they have- is too good to let go, and Barry would never sacrifice their relationship after something so small.

Right?

** v. **

Two weeks after Len leaves, Barry buys tickets to Metropolis to see Len under the pretence of helping Iris with her report on Superman, the hero that’s suddenly running (...flying?) around, saving people from burning buildings and bringing kittens down from trees. He is supposed to gather pictures and quotes from people who have been saved by the guy- and he does, honest, just… not as many as Iris would probably have wanted.

But really, he misses Len. So much; they talk on the phone at every chance they get, which is mostly every day, but as much as Barry may love Len’s voice he loves kissing him even more. So he gets his trains tickets, and leaves for Metropolis first thing in the morning (on time, for a better change, but then again Len has always brought out the best in Barry).

He sees Len, and stays with him at a cute apartment in the centre of the city (“The key to hiding, Barry, is to hide in plain sight- exposed enough so the police think you’re smarter, but not hiding too much to be obvious.”). They spend the weekend together, kissing and watching movies on Barry’s Netflix, eating homemade meals courtesy of Len (who cooks surprisingly well, and Barry would be proud if it wasn’t for the knot in his stomach when he realises why) and baked goods from the charming Mexican bakery down the street.

It’s all good until it isn’t, or at least that’s how Len feels the moment his oh so beloved baby sister barges into the safehouse uninvited and demands a reason for Len’s coldness and really, all Barry can think of the situation is _thank fuck she didn’t come in ten minutes ago, or this would be a completely different conversation_.

And, oh. _Oh,_ is all Lisa can say, because the boy sitting on Len’s couch with his head on Len’s shoulder is the cutest and Len’s smile is one that Lisa has never seen before.  

They wind up going out for coffee, after awkward introductions and Lisa going completely crazy over Barry (“Soulmate?! Oh, Lenny, you’re so lucky to be stuck with this one, then! He’s sweeter than apple pie!”) to some place downtown. Barry manages to get a few shots of this Superman guy, and gets Lisa talking about him and his antics and how _overrated_ he is. “Seriously,” She says, her long nails tapping onto the table before her. “All superheroes are overrated. _Supervillains_ , however…”

** vi. **

“You’re going to Starling?”

“Yeah. It’s only for a few days, though. I’ll be back home hopefully a day before they turn on the particle accelerator.”

“Hm, good. Call me, okay? As soon as you can.”

“Of course, Len. Thank you.”

“Anytime, Barry.”

** vii. **

“This Queen character sounds like a dick.”

“He kind of is, in all honesty. He’s… passable, though. Not as bad as he could have been.”

“How could’ve he been?”

“Well, I dunno, he could have been Bruce Wayne.”

“Oh, well, I think that guy is a _special_ kind of asshole.”

“Wow, Len.”

“Hey, I'm just stating facts. The Felicity girl okay, though?”

“Yeah! She’s super smart and stuff. Actually understands what I'm talking about. Plus, guess what?”

“What?”

“She works with the Arrow! How cool is that?”

“The Arrow?”

“Yeah, the Starling City vigilante. He calls himself that now, apparently.”

“...Interesting.”

** viii. **

Barry calls Felicity not to ask her out, but to tell her that he’s happily taken but he hopes she can find someone- or better yet, her soulmate- soon. She seemed so sad when he’d said that- her words sorrowful and wavering- that Barry almost felt bad, until she explained that her soulmate was around, just not interested.

That gave Barry an idea of who exactly this person may be, but he keeps to himself about that. It’s none of his business.

Instead he hangs up with her with his best wishes, and calls Len while turning on the news on the particle accelerator on his computer.

“Did you make it to the event?” Len asks him.

“No, I was too late. I'm watching it on the news, though.”

“Sorry, Barr.”

“Eh, whatever. The broadcast is pretty good, and-” 

“And?”

“Len, I think there’s something wrong with the accelerator. They’re evacuating everyone, and- ah. Ah  _shit,_ Len!”

“Barry? What’s going on? Are you okay?”

“Len, I think it blew up. Len, shit, I’ll call you later, I have to- what the _fuck_ -”

The line goes dead.

“Barry? Barry!” Len yells into the phone just as his vision goes grey, and for the first time in a long time, he’s afraid.

** ix. **

Struck by lightning. His soulmate was _struck by lightning_. Only that dork could have such luck, Lisa says, but Len is more worried with the “He’s lucky to even be alive,” Although the kid keeps going into cardiac arrest and the hospital keeps having power outages.

Len visits after hours and under disguise, careful not to let anyone who comes visit see him, and the nurses let him stay inside the room when he tells them he can only see red and yellow, green when Barry has a heart attack _again_. They all look at him in pity, and Lisa sends him worried texts, sometimes calls; he never answers.

Three months in, Harrison Wells offers to take Barry into STAR Labs and continue his treatment somewhere he can actually be treated; Len only knows this thanks to a nurse, who brings him snacks and smiles softly at him all the time (if he gave a shit, he would find it creepy, but all he cares about right now is Barry and how much he doesn’t trust Wells).

It’s an upgrade, to change his location, and Wells says he can help- even though his eyes are weird, stony cold, and Len really, really doesn’t trust him.

Detective West agrees a day after the offer is made,  unsure but hopeful (because as little as Len may like him, West can see the secrets hiding behind Wells’ glasses and feel the danger seeping off of the other man, too).

Barry is transferred to STAR Labs a week after West agrees. He’s kept at the very core of the facility, always watched by either one of the doctors (or employees, rather, because there’s a geneticist and an engineer, none of them certified in a _medical_ field) or Harrison Wells himself. Len goes to visit, once, when the geneticist is on duty; she’s on a bathroom break when Len breaks in, and he’s grateful for the two-hundred and forty-three seconds he has with his Barry. His Barry, who simply looks _asleep_ , and Len has the fleeting thought that he’ll wake up and smile dopily at Len in the way he always did- like if he were the sun and moon and stars, his whole universe, everything good to look at (which is ridiculous, because Len is everything but good).

Len sighs and presses a light kiss onto Barry’s forehead, wishing to at least be able to see that green he fell in love with _months_ ago at least one more time. But no; instead he steels himself, whispers one last goodbye, and leaves with seventy-three seconds left and no proof that he was even there in the first place.

He doesn’t come back.

He _can’t_.

** x. **

_where are you? Where have you gone? I am nowhere, I am everywhere, I don’t know anymore._

** xi. **

_Cold. Quick, go, leave, stay, please? It’s cold cold cold cold cold cold cold cold cold c_

** xii. **

_grey? Blue. Green, pink- grey. Red, orange, yellow, purple- grey. Grey grey grey grey green- pink, brown red yellow orange grey. Red? Brown black black black blac white. Turquoise?_

** xiii. **

_awake unafraid asleep dead awake unafraid asleep dead awake unafraid asleep dead lying next to me words never speak asleep dead see you you you you you_

** xiv. **

Len spends two months in a prison in National City, escapes, and goes back to Central not three months after he left. Oh, how he loves torturing himself, it seems- he considers visiting Barry, just to feed his masochism, but then he thinks about how _wrong_ he looks in all the hospital whites, so he lets the thought rest; his partial colourblindness is a reminder enough of everything he’s lost, and he really doesn’t need the physical mock of it. He turns the idea of drinking his pitifulness away around in his head, but Lisa smacks _that_ particular thought out of him faster than one may say 'lightning'.

He lies low for a few extra weeks, always on the lookout for news about Barry, until an acquaintance calls with an offer for a heist. It’s in Central, generally easy, and definitely worth a fortune, so Len has absolutely no reason to turn it down (though he still considers it, because he’s happy wallowing in self-pity and excruciating emotional pain and constipation).

So he says yes as he finally tires of being tired, and alone. At least this gives him something to do, something to think about and put his mind into and distract himself from the reality of his situation.

 

* * *

 

This job turns out to be interesting, but mundane- he studies every single detail of it with careful precision, throwing all of himself and his mind into it. He plans the heist like any other- down to the last millisecond- and gives everyone their part, expecting them to learn them vigorously.

Now that the only thing left to do is wait for the best, Len lounges on the couch in front of a TV in the safehouse he’s been staying in (the same one he brought Barry to most of the time, and he doesn’t give a shit if it’s reckless or foolish, he’ll stay here until the pillows stop smelling like Barry).

He’s mostly focused on the movie he’s watching- some soulmate romcom movie- but then something feels different. the air, maybe, a slight shift in his surroundings, and the woman on the TV keeps on talking, but Len isn’t paying attention to what’s being said anymore.

The only thing in his mind is the green of her shirt, the blue of the sky behind her, the purple of the flowers she holds and, fuck, _Bar_ _ry._

* * *

 

 

Barry comes into their coffeeshop (where all their previous dates had been held- some hole in the wall place called _Coffee for Humanitea)_ , fifty-six seconds after Len sits down at their usual table (on the far back, near the emergency exit and a window) and one hundred and eighty-four after he came in. Barry takes eight seconds to spot Len among the small crowd and walk over, _that_ smile all over his face.

The moment he pulls Len into a hug, it feels like he can finally breathe again after over nine months.

They go back to Len’s apartment, because Barry’s hands are soft and his lips taste of something Len doesn’t ever want to forget. He makes a point of kissing and marking every inch of skin he can reach, and he pulls the most sinful sounds out of Barry, relief and happiness and complete _adoration_ marking his every move. When they’re done Len tells Barry about all he missed, omitting _certain_ details, and Barry tells him about the odd dreams he can't quite remember.

** xvi. **

after Len falls asleep- well over midnight, bordering on early morning- Barry runs to Starling City. It’s a physical struggle to pull away from Len’s arms, so warm and safe, but he needs to speak to Oliver about… all of this.

How does he do it, he wants to ask. _How do you live with the causalities?  How do you stay a person after witnessing the worst of humanity?_

“Wear a mask,” Oliver tells him- Barry’s own advice, weighed down with much more meaning that he’d given it the first time almost ten months ago.

He thinks about Oliver’s words on the run back and as he watches the sun rise and sunlight filter in through the curtains in Len’s room.

** xvii. **

“So, heroism, huh?”

“Yeah, I know. Pretty crazy, right?”

“Well, yeah. I guess now we _are_ quite the pair, are we not?”

Barry laughs. “You could always join me, y’know?”

“What? And run around all leather-clad like you do? No thanks, kid.”

“You’d make a good hero, Len. I know it.”

“I don’t think I'm cut out for the job, babe. I’m no good person.”

“Oh, Len…”

** xviii. **

When the Flash foils the heist Len planned for _months,_ Barry has the audacity to look smug.

 _That little shit,_ Len thinks, and then his train of thought slips towards something like, _game on, kid._

Barry winks at his sour look from where he sits on the couch- his own couch, for once, because Len had to change safehouses- and it is then that Len takes things personally.

_Game on._

** xix. **

The gun was designed to kill the Flash.

It was designed and built to kill _Barry,_ by one Cisco Ramon. The seller explains the technicalities behind it, and every word makes Len’s resolve become bolder- force the kid to become stronger, faster, better, so that nobody can ever hurt him again.

Honestly, if Ramon weren’t Barry’s friend, Len probably would have already iced him even though the reasons behind it make sense.

The thought that anyone may want to kill the Flash makes Len’s blood go cold in his veins, and so he kills the guy who gave it to him so word doesn’t get out until it absolutely has to.

No way he’s gonna let anyone have a weapon capable of hurting his soulmate.

...anyone but himself, anyway.

** xx. **

In Len’s defence, this is his first test run and he didn’t actually know what the thing actually _did_. At least to Barry. He knows simple physics, and it is a fact that Barry’s faster than the cold blast- they’re actually going to have a long and hearty conversation about this whole “jumping in front of a bullet instead of _pushing himself and the other person away”_ nonsense later- but he failed to measure the actual extent of the damage.

He actually does feel guilty about killing that one security guard (his honour code is simple, and killing a civilian is definitely a violation, but again, _he didn’t know)_ and Barry’s eyes make the guilt feel like lead in his stomach.

But he has to push him to be better; Len can’t afford to think of a situation where Barry’s hurt beyond repair or worse. He has to be the best of all, and if that means that Len has to (accidentally) kill someone, then so be it.

Call it tough love.

** xxi. **

On the train, Len is smirking at Barry and _winking_ , and then he ices the train tracks and all Barry can think is _that fucking twat._

And then later, when he’s pinned to the ground by the ice from Len’s gun and his googles are down and he has that fucking cocky-ass smirk on his stupid-ass mouth, Barry almost laughs out loud at the hilarity of the situation. Len seems to notice, too, because he looks so _fucking_ proud and his eyes are soft but satisfied.

He almost says something stupid like _fuck off, asshole,_ but then Cisco is there with the STAR Labs vacuum cleaner and Len is giving him a flirty, terrible pun in farewell.

Len is actually pretty impressed with Ramon- a hundred percent aware of the vacuum cleaner stunt, but pretty reassured by the goodness of Barry’s friends.

Plus, that Felicity chick is actually pretty hot, if Len’s got to say anything about it.

** xxii.  **

They still go out on dates and sleep together, but the added weight of their new villain-superhero personas and dynamic starts to make things interesting, to say the least.

 Len is gone for a few weeks after the diamond heist, and when he returns he’s got company- almost kill Barry, the assholes. But by now Barry knows (and has been told, countless times by Len) that his soulmate doesn’t take this little game so seriously and would never hurt Barry. Much. ( _Only if you don’t run around actively trying to get hurt, idiot.)_

Kidnapping Caitlin had been a pretty low blow, though, even if the bomb was a ruse and she wasn’t in any actual danger. Len gets to sleep on the couch for that one, once he comes home, which _of course_ is only a few hours after Barry sent his and that Rory guy’s butt to Iron Heights, because of course they were going to break out before they even checked in.

Obviously. Of course.

Fucking assholes.

** xxiii. **

Len yells at Barry every time he gets hurt; apparently he won’t hear the end of any of these, because his soulmate turned out to be worse than _Caitlin._

“Seriously, Barry? You’re so dumb, sometimes. Gotta be more careful, kid, or there will be one day when you won’t make it out.”

Barry’s seething, though he knows Len’s words are true. He doesn’t know what to say- he mumbles some incoherent bullshit, and though he now knows Len’s face well enough to know that he hasn’t been fooled, Len drops the conversation for now.

He ends it with, “I’m just saying, Barry, that you have to be prepared for anything.”

** xxiv. **

Kidnapping Barry’s friends had, apparently, become Len’s favourite pastime.

“It’s to get to know your friends better,” is Len’s completely shitty excuse. “Plus it’s not like I tortured them or anything. I even got Ramon and his brother to make good so really, you should be _thanking_ me.”

And… shit. Okay. Barry can’t deny that that was a great outcome, but still- “Kidnapping and terrorizing two people is still pretty fucked up, Len! Don’t do it again, okay?”

Len rolls his eyes at Barry, kissing him on the side of his head. “Whatever you say, honey.”

** xxv. **

Barry doesn’t tell Len about that kiss with Iris when he explains the mess that was travelling a day into the past. Not because he’s afraid of Len’s reaction, but because he’s afraid to admit it actually _happened;_ it’s a stupid conclusion, and it leaves Barry with a bad taste in his mouth, because this is the first time he’s ever lied to Len- or not, because he never mentioned his crush on Iris, or confessing said crush over Christmas, but the point is that it’s always about Iris and Barry has absolutely no idea of what he’s going to _do._

When he tries to explain, at least to Iris, he fucks up.

At least Len has a pretty big laugh about _that_.

** xxvi. **

“‘Really don’t trust that Wells guy.”

“Really? is that so?”

“Yep. Haven’t since the beginning.”

“Huh…”

“What? Got something to say?”

“I was just wondering why.”

“He’s creepy. And… off. Like he’s hiding something. That’s never good on anyone.”

“Oh.”

** xxvii. **

The newspaper from the future reads Iris West-Allen. Barry feels sick at the implications.

** xxviii. **

Barry comes home (when did Len’s safehouses start feeling like _home?_ ) one day a mess- crying and raging and broken beyond recognition. He looks awful and he takes out his anger on a wall and then on Len, hits his chest repeatedly until he is sure it’s gonna bruise, but he lets him, because he obviously needs to vent out his frustrations in more ways than verbally.

And then, when he’s exhausted himself, he tells Len about everything that happened- from the reverse flash and Eddie disappearing and the secret rooms and what Gideon told him, and it is Len who seethes  and curses that bastard son of a bitch.

Len is going to _kill_ this little piece of shit. He is going to kill him so slowly and painfully that he will beg for release, which Len will only grant once he’s sure he’s suffered a thousand times more than he has made Barry do, which will probably be never.

Whoever hurts Barry like this deserves that. _His_ Barry. Whoever dares to break his trust and the perception of good he has in the world deserves that and much more.

Len is going to find Harrison Wells- _Eobard Thawne-_ himself and fucking _skin him alive._

** xxix. **

When Barry goes to ask Len for help to transport the metas, he expresses his hatred towards the plan- and everything before that- so openly, Barry actually reconsiders it.  

And alright, fuck, Len is _right_ , and suddenly Barry feels like a complete ass because these metas are still people, just like him, and solitary confinement and imprisonment without trial is… well. He of all people should _know_ better about being wrongfully or unfairly convicted. So yes, he fucked up, but he can fix this… right?

He just hopes they don’t hate him too much.

Len happily agrees to foil their plans, with the help of Lisa and Mick and an undercover Barry; their own plan, however hastily written out, turned out better than it could have. The metas got away, and even if there were two innocent causalities and probably billions of dollars in damage to that plane, it was worth it.

The only meta who didn’t make it had it coming to him, anyway. Nobody tries to kill Barry in Len’s watch.

** xxx. **

“He offered me to go back in time and save my mom, Len. I- I don’t know what to do.”

“Barry… I don’t know what you should do, either. All I can say is, are you willing to lose everything and everyone you know? Can you make the sacrifice? Are you absolutely sure you won’t regret the consequences as they come?”

“… what I’m scared of is… regretting not seeing what would happen, y’know?”

“Then I guess you’ve made your choice.”

** xxxi. **

A few days after they talked for the last time, Len watches the streak of lightning from the window of some apartment and with his heart on his throat he runs up to the roof, catches a peek of the explosion and for a terrifying moment his vision goes grey again- before he’s sitting on the same spot he was ten minutes ago, on the couch in front of the television, his mouth dry and a strong sense of déjà-vu heavy in his mind.

** xxxii. **

Barry stumbles into Len’s current safehouse later that night, and he falls straight into Len’s arms- exhausted, smelling of smoke and something else (Ozone? Coffee? Steamed milk? Baby vomit?), and looking like shit frozen over.

He tells Len about everything that happened over the past few days- how they built a time machine and opened a wormhole, and how he ran faster than he ever has, how he went back and saw his mother murdered right before his eyes, held her as she gave her last breath because his future self told him not to save her. He told Len about how he came back through a _wormhole_ (Len has a friend who would shit his pants over this- maybe he’ll call him later), saw the future, past, and present, all at the same time, fighting Eobard Thawne, Eddie and Ronnie’s deaths and the black hole opening right above STAR Labs (he will _definitely_ call his friend later) (Also, _what the fuck?_ When _the fuck?_ ), and then _going back in time_  again to fight Eobard Thawne and succeed in killing him and throwing him into the wormhole right before it closed.

Len is left stunned in place, and he takes a second to process all of this information; suddenly his entire perspective is changed, and that’s quite the midfuck, but Barry looks like he’s about to burst out crying and Len has to do _something_ \- so he reaches out and hugs his soulmate close, kisses his forehead, and lets him sob into his shoulder.

When he’s done and the sun is starting to come up Len picks him up bridal style and carries Barry to the bathroom, shutting the door behind them. He places Barry gently onto the edge of the shower and moves to remove all of their clothes, Barry watching him closely and curiously.

Len draws a bath and sits beside Barry in silence while it fills; the younger’s head on his shoulder and his arm around Len's waist.

He takes one of Barry’s bath bombs and lets him rest his head against Len’s chest once they’re in the water, and then Len starts telling Barry those silly stories he loves so much.

By the time the sun is completely above the horizon, Barry’s smiling once more, and Len can be convinced that things will be okay again.

** xxxiii. **

Barry wakes up to pancakes, hot chocolate, and old songs playing from Len’s speakers.

Said man is in the kitchen and responsible for the heavenly smells, Barry finds out when he finally walks away from the bed at… three in the afternoon. He has to pause for a second to take everything in, the warm feeling in his chest when he looks at the way Len sways to the sound of Elvis Presley's hypnotic voice and realises how absolutely domestic this whole situation is.  

And he just can’t help himself- he walks up to Len and hugs him from behind, buries his face on the crook of his neck and wraps his arms around Len’s naked waist. Len hums in appreciation- “Good morning,” he says, turning his head to place a kiss on Barry’s, pressing himself more closely to him, still swaying to the music.

“More like afternoon,” Barry laughs.

** xxxiv. **

Telling Barry’s friends about their relationship went as well as it sounds.

Barry had taken Len to STAR Labs, determined to keep his new _no more secrets_ promise, and then they were forced to explain everything with Len being held at gunpoint by Detective West.

At least everyone else seemed pretty chill after some details were explained.

“How fun,” Len tells Barry when they’re done, after they’d told the story and were glared at for the better part of an hour, West glaring at Len’s back, and all the _wonderful_ things an angry Cisco Ramon is capable of saying.

Barry has the decency to at least look sheepish. “Yeah.”

 

** xxxv.  **

“I love you,” Len says, out of nowhere, one morning.

 They are eating breakfast (Barry’s gross lucky charms, which Len loves to hate), sitting on the couch of what has come to become Len and Barry’s official flat, at least for their ‘meetups’ (though it would be a lie to say that they don’t live here already, like the stupidly domestic couple they are) and watching TV.

Barry turns to Len, surprised, and Len- in the lack of anything else to say, faced with the embarrassing reality that he just literally blurted out _that_ \- laughs.

And then he continues to dig his own grave, because why not, right?

“I’ve loved you since before all of this mess. I love everything that you and you nerdy ass entail, because in all honesty I kinda needed the crazy, y’know? And I- I know I'm not very good with words, and I mostly try to show it through actions, but then I realised I had never said it out loud and neither had you so I just… yeah.”

Barry’s still staring at him. Fuck. Len can’t bring himself to look. Is he moving too fast? Oh my god, he’s moving too fast. _Shit-_

Barry’s lips interrupt his train of thought and Len finds himself chasing them, momentarily stunned into silence.

“I thought I would be the first one to say it,” Barry admits, a goofy grin on his face, lucky charms forgotten. “But I love you too. So much.”

Len coughs awkwardly, and his ears are hot. “Well,” He says, “Surprise?”

Barry laughs, happy, and kisses him again. “Indeed.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> I'm thinking of making some kind of sequel, so if that's good enough drop me a comment! <3  
> Hugs & Kisses? Kicks & Punches? Existential Questions & Space Travel?  
> Anything goes!  
> Come cry with me about these two dorks on [tumblr!!](http://coolerthan0k.tumblr.com)


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